Detoxing is one of those nonsense things that air-headed celebs get into now and then, isn’t it? Cutting out some important food group and feeling just fabulous because of it. What about digital detox? Just an excuse for one of those lifestyle columns where a ‘busy mum’ (for which you can read ‘metro journalist’) bans phones and tablets for a week. At first she’s hilariously panicky, but by the end of the week she’s bonded with the kids and baked a cake. Hey, why don’t we all just put our phones down and take a few minutes to talk to each other? There’s a beautiful world out there, and it’s slipping past you one tweet at a time.
Well, I don’t want to be getting into any of that bullshit, but I have got a project for the week. The news is always unrelentingly depressing, and all Facebook ever does is remind you that everyone you know is a moron, so I came up with this: I’m on leave for a week, and I plan to avoid news sites and Facebook for the whole period and see how I feel at the end of it. We’re only on day three, but I can tell you how I feel so far – pretty good.
I guess what we have here might be called, by a hateful media a-hole, a partial digital detox. Just cutting out the most toxic elements of the digital diet, much like you might cut only the doughnuts and hard liquor from your actual diet. What would you do for your midmorning snack if you didn’t have the option of hard liquor and doughnuts? Thank the lord this is purely digital.